Howard's death at one year

 

Subject: To Howard
Newsgroups: soc.motss
Organization: Cabal Noir: Universal Headquarters

  It's been a year ago today that Howard left us,
a year that has been painful for all of us who
knew and loved him. It really seems hard to
imagine as I still vividly see his enthusiasm at
some of the most mundane or peculiar things that
had, for some reason or another, piqued his
endless curiosity. I still hear his voice
answering the phone "Michael!" I especially
remember his passion for things that he enjoyed;
even when you knew that he was being a bit tetched,
it was still fun to watch him enthuse.
  Howard leaves a legacy with many people, but I
think for Arne and me one of the most important
parts of that legacy is our love of food and wine
and the importance of the social ritual with good
food and good friends. There is something magical
with the product of the day's labor being so
appreciated by your friends, yet totally
non-sentimental as it is consumed, like friendship, 
on a day to day basis.
  I guess this was poetic in some ways, because
for Howard there was only the current moment. Even
when he was pain, he tried to make the most of
what he had. He always approached life with a
gusto and verve that was truly inspirational. I
didn't know Howard before he became sick, so I
don't know if he was always like this (I suspect
so), but his passion for life was contagious. 
  In real life, Howard had a wonderful, passionate
presence that is really hard to explain. Ken made
a video of Howard -- various clips of trips they
had taken -- that absolutely catches his very
essence. At Howard's memorial, Ken played this 
for us and I don't think there was anybody who
could speak for 20 minutes afterward as it was 
so *him*. So, so Howard. I especially remember
the scene of Howard gobbling down some greasy
burger in Seattle. And now he's gone.  
  Richard Johnson started a custom amongst some of
the people who knew and loved Howard to always
start the evening's meal with an obligatory toast
which is a simple, yet powerful way to pay homage to
this important fixture in our lives. I miss Howard
immensely, and can barely contain my tears, but on
this year's anniversary of his death, I can think
of nothing more fitting today than this simple
toast:

  "To Howard"
-- 
Michael Thomas	(mike@mtcc.com http://www.mtcc.com/~mike/)
  Pass the bottle and damn the expense
  I've heard it said by a man of sense
  That the labouring classes could scarce live a day
  If people like us didn't eat, drink and pay
    -- A. H. Clough